At a recent computer exposition, Bill Gates reportedly compared the
computer industry with the auto industry and stated "If General Motors had
kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would
all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon".

In response to Bill's comments, GM issued a press release stating: "If
General Motors had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics:

1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.

2. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You
would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the
windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could
continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this.

3. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause
your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would
have to reinstall the engine.

4. The airbag system would ask "are you sure?" before deploying.

5. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out
and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door
handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.

6. Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn
to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in
the same manner as the old car.

7. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
=============================================================================
DO YOU SMELL THAT?

A cold March wind danced around the dead of night in Dallas as the
doctor walked into the small hospital room of Diana Blessing. She was still
groggy from surgery. Her husband, David, held her hand as they braced
themselves for the latest news.

That afternoon of March 10, 1991, complications had forced Diana, only
24-weeks pregnant, to undergo an emergency Cesarean to deliver couple's
new daughter, Dana Lu Blessing. At 12 inches long and weighing only one
pound nine ounces, they already knew she was perilously premature.
Still, the doctor's soft words dropped like bombs.

"I don't think she's going to make it," he said, as kindly as he could.
"There's only a 10-percent chance she will live through the night, and
even then, if by some slim chance she does make it, her future could be
a very cruel one." Numb with disbelief, David and Diana listened as the
doctor described the devastating problems Dana would likely face if she
survived.

She would never walk, she would never talk, she would probably be
blind, and she would certainly be prone to other catastrophic conditions
from cerebral palsy to complete mental retardation, and on and on.

"No! No!" was all Diana could say.

She and David, with their 5-year-old son Dustin, had long dreamed of
the day they would have a daughter to become a family of four. Now,
within a matter of hours, that dream was slipping away.

But as those first days passed, a new agony set in for David and Diana.
Because Dana's underdeveloped nervous system was essentially 'raw', the
lightest kiss or caress only intensified her discomfort, so they
couldn't even cradle their tiny baby girl against their chests to offer the
strength of their love. All they could do, as Dana struggled alone
beneath the ultraviolet light in the tangle of tubes and wires, was to pray
that God would stay close to their precious little girl.

There was never a moment when Dana suddenly grew stronger. But as the
weeks went by, she did slowly gain an ounce of weight here and an ounce
of strength there. At last, when Dana turned two months old, her
parents were able to hold her in their arms for the very first time. And two
months later, though doctors continued to gently but grimly warn that
her chances of surviving, much less living any kind of normal life, were
next to zero, Dana went home from the hospital, just as her mother had
predicted.

Five years later, when Dana was a petite but feisty young girl with
glittering gray eyes and an unquenchable zest for life. She showed no
signs whatsoever of any mental or physical impairment. Simply, she was
everything a little girl can be and more. But that happy ending is far from
the end of her story.

One blistering afternoon in the summer of 1996 near her home in Irving,
Texas, Dana was sitting in her mother's lap in the bleachers of a local
ball park where her brother Dustin's baseball team was practicing.

As always, Dana was chattering nonstop with her mother and several
other adults sitting nearby when she suddenly fell silent. Hugging her
arms across her chest, little Dana asked, "Do you smell that?" Smelling
the air and detecting the approach of thunderstorm, Diana replied, "Yes,
it smells like rain."

Dana closed her eyes and again asked, "Do you smell that?" Once again,
her mother replied, "Yes, I think we're about to get wet. It smells
like rain."

Still caught in the moment, Dana shook her head, patted her thin
shoulders with her small hands and loudly announced, "No, it smells like Him.
It smells like God when you lay your head on His chest." Tears blurred
Diana's eyes as Dana happily hopped down to play with the other
children.

Before the rains came, her daughter's words confirmed what Diana and
all the members of the extended Blessing family had known, at least in
their hearts, all along. During those long days and nights of her first
two months of her life, when her nerves were too sensitive for them to
touch her, God was holding Dana on His chest and it is His loving scent
that she remembers so well.
==============================================================================
TOP 20 OXYMORONs

20. Alone together
19. Clearly misunderstood
18. Peace force
17. Found missing
16. Temporary tax increase
15. Computer jock
14. Plastic glasses
13. Terribly pleased
12. Good grief
11. Political science
10. Tight slacks
9. Definite maybe
8. Pretty ugly
7. Twelve-ounce pound cake
6. Diet ice cream
5. Rap music
4. Working vacation
3. Exact estimate
2. Act naturally
1. Microsoft Works
==========================================================================
MINDSET: LIFE IS

Okay, so you know who you are. You know that you are smart, intelligent
and capable. You have worked through inner critic issues from your
childhood and you know that you can do anything you set your mind to.

You know that you want to be a genuinely good, kind, and caring person
but that there is another very real side of you that is sometimes lazy,
grumpy, and would not mind if others would spoil you a bit more often.

You know that you are co-creating your future along with some sort of a
spiritual guidance that challenges you to be better, then you might
normally choose if that higher power was not holding you accountable for
your choices.

You know that there is something incredible, uplifting, and wonderful
that you are meant to contribute to the world. You know that you are
born for that very purpose ... but you just cannot quite figure out what
it is.

You know folks who really are not all that spiritual who get up every
morning and go to work. They like their jobs well enough, but none of it
sounds very appealing to you.

You do not have an undying desire to become a fire fighter or a teacher
or a politician or anything else for that matter.

Those are careers that you really commit yourself to as opposed to
filing clerk, waitress, or taxi driver which you can do without really
putting much emotional involvement into them.

There is nothing wrong with just getting some random job that you are
good at and earning a living. You know that you have talents and have
some ideas how to use them. However, you want something more than a
boring nine to five job.

You know that you are not for that kind of job. You want to be
passionate about your work, because you are passionate about your life.

You also know people who hear a little voice calling them to do sacred
work. They always hear a divine voice that tells them what to do or
they feel a real sense of mission in life.

They absolutely must become musicians, artists, or writers. They have
to save the rainforests, or free Tibet, or become a pediatrician because
not doing so is like not breathing.

They always believe that it is the core of who they are and that is the
very purpose of they being born on this planet.

You would like to be drafted into such an overwhelming calling but your
number has not been called just yet.

You feel as though you have been trained and specially designed to do
some sort of important work, but you have not been told what it is you
are going to do. But, the truth is, you may never be assigned to one
particular project or job.
Let us use a military analogy. There are just so many ace pilots, just
so many generals, and just so many Navy Seals, etc. You know that you
are supposed to serve your country but have really no idea what you are
supposed to do.

You have enlisted and are now awaiting your orders. However, unlike the
military, you probably are not going to be told what to do.

Basically, you can do whatever you want just so long as you are a good
little soldier and make sure that you represent our side with honour
and integrity.

While you are waiting for divine inspiration, pretend that you are a
sniper and you are shooting people with positive healing energy. Be like
Cupid with your arrows of love.

If you are a filing clerk, then imagine that you are filing pieces of
love and spirit into the perfect slots so that the next time someone
pulls that file they will be touched by your peaceful calmness.

If the files are about specific people like legal cases or medical
charts or home mortgages, imagine each person or family whom that piece of
paper represents and send them a silent prayer that they are happy and
safe.

If you happen to be a waitress while waiting for some sort of divine
calling, then pray love and health over each meal as you serve it.

If you are a taxi driver, then silently turn your taxi into a holy
sanctuary where everyone who rides with you is in a place of peace and
spiritual cleansing for a bit.

By saying this, I am not asking you to make these things publicly known
or to have everyone looking at you like you have lost your mind.

I am saying that you can spread your spirituality and sacredness no
matter how mundane your daily job may seem.

It may or may not help make the world a better place, but I guarantee
that you will feel better about your day and how you spend your time
while at work.
=================================================================================